I get it. You are knee deep in deposits. Everyone is coming. Your mom told you that you can’t call it off. But everything you just said is not a reason to get married. If the first thing out of your mouth on why you need to follow through with the wedding isn’t that you love him (or her), you need to take pause. A case of the pre-wedding jitters is normal. It’s a big day with a whole lot of pressure, so it’s only natural to experience a healthy dose of nerves leading up to the wedding day. But when those jitters turn to something deeper is when you need to stop and reconsider. Here’s how to tell if you are having cold feet or if you’re making a mistake.
TRUST YOUR FEELINGS
If you feel like fleeing rather than a little nervous pay attention. In the end, it takes courage, to be honest about these things. If you aren’t honest with yourself and communicate your feelings to your fiancé, you will default into a life rather than choosing.
THIS IS A LIFESTYLE CHOICE
Consider what it will be like to live together every day. Practice working out conflicts and different preferences before deciding to marry, so you either realize s/he’s not the one or he is. In the end, the happiest couples learn to compassionately work through differences into greater intimacy.
THE LITMUS TEST
Every couple will have differences and conflicts to work through. It’s human nature. How and if you are able to do this is the litmus test. Having at least one person in the couple with high emotional intelligence significantly improves the chances of a successful marriage. You and your partner can take the Emotional Operating System (EOS) Quiz and discover your scores. If both of you score low, I suggest you do some couples workshops, classes and/or counseling before marrying.
You’re engaged! Congrats! Now before you go buying your wedding dress and custom reception menus, the absolute first thing you need to do is set a budget. Don’t go out picking your venue and setting the date without a firm budget in place, and ideally allocate your budget to each category. And we all know you might go slightly over budget (shhh!)! So avoid feeling overwhelmed (and going into debt) with this road map for bringing your vision to life without compromising your financial health. Do yourself a favor and read these 5 saving strategies for funding your wedding.
PRIORITIZE YOUR NEEDS
Whether that be the dress as mentioned earlier, the food, decor or the music, sit down as a couple and iron out what’s important to you as a couple. Your needs and your wants. Then prioritize them and allocate them by percentage according to your budget. Always keep in mind your long-term goals such as owning a home, travel, etc.
SET A BUDGET
Set a budget. I’m not repeating myself. By saying set a budget, I’m asking you to stick to it. Don’t later say… but this floral option or this wedding invitation is so much prettier. The average cost of a wedding is upwards of $30,000 which requires a savings of $2,500/month. If you need to, extend your engagement to give yourself enough time to save and/or tighten the money belt to reach your goal.
START SAVING EARLY
As soon as a budget is set, begin saving. The earlier a couple starts socking away for the big day, the better. Talk as a couple on ways you can set aside money each month.
OPEN A WEDDING FUND ACCOUNT
Keep the money you’re saving for the wedding in an account that’s separate from your regular checking and savings account. This will help to better track milestones and eliminate the sensation to splurge when the dollar amount starts going up.
USE CREDIT WISELY
It’s alright to put wedding items on a credit card in order to rack up points, and take advantage of other benefits. However, in order for a credit card to work in your favor, it is necessary to pay the balance off in full each month. If you’re unable to pay for the charge within the billing cycle, that is a clear indicator that you’re going over budget.
Don’t forget, the most important part of a wedding is celebrating the love between two people — not how much, or little money is spent. Couples should dole out whatever makes them comfortable, while also remembering going into debt to finance a wedding isn’t worth it.
The bouquet, that something blue, the garter toss. Have you ever taken a second to consider the purpose of all of these wedding traditions? And whether or not you’d like to continue each tradition for your wedding nuptials. Here is everything you need to know about wedding traditions from the history to its meaning. What wedding traditions are you going to include in your wedding?
As it turn out… it’s your “ring finger” for a reason. Engagement and wedding rings are worn on the fourth finger of the left hand because it was once thought that a vein in that finger led directly to the heart.
WHITE WEDDING DRESS
Queen Victoria is credited with starting the white wedding dress trend in 1840 — before then, brides simply wore their favorite dress in their favorite color. The white dress became a symbol of wealth because it could only be worn once, while other people would wear their colored wedding dress again one year later to parties and formal affairs.
If your bridesmaids are less than thrilled about matching dresses, tell them they are meant to be for good luck! The tradition of matching bridesmaids dates back to Roman times, when people believed evil spirits would attend the wedding in attempt to curse the bride and groom. Bridesmaids were required to dress alike in order to confuse the spirits and bring luck to the marriage.
On a similar note, brides traditionally wear veils because ancient Greeks and Romans believed they protected her from evil spirits.
The tradition of a bride wearing “something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue,” comes from an Old English rhyme. Something old represents continuity; something new offers optimism for the future; something borrowed symbolizes borrowed happiness; something blue stands for purity, love, and fidelity.
The tradition of a wedding cake comes from ancient Rome, where guests broke a loaf of bread over the bride’s head for fertility’s sake. Guests would then scramble around her feet to pick up the crumbs, in order to absorb some of that good luck.
TYING THE KNOT
Ever wondered where the phrase “tying the knot” came from? In many cultures around the world — including Celtic, Hindu and Egyptian weddings — the hands of the bride and groom are literally tied together to demonstrate the couple’s commitment to each other and their new bond.
GROOM CARRYING THE BRIDE
If you thought I was over the spirit thing, think again. According to tradition, the groom carries the bride across the threshold to valiantly protect her from evil spirits lurking below.
MONTH OF JUNE
June weddings are not a new thing. The Roman goddess Juno rules over marriage and childbirth, hence the popularity of June weddings.
Honeymoons weren’t always so luxurious. Ancient Norse bridal couples went into hiding after the wedding, and a family member would bring them a cup of honey wine for 30 days — or one moon — which is how the term “honeymoon” originated.
Ancient Greek brides would carry clusters of herbs and spices—not flowers—to ward off evil spirits. That tiny bundle was thought to have magical powers. Thankfully, we’ve graduated from aromatic, herb-filled bouquets to ones filled with peonies, roses and many other gorgeous flowers.
BOUQUET AND GARTER TOSS
Tossing the bouquet is a standard tradition seen at most weddings, although, the garter toss is slowly losing its relevancy among modern-day brides. While the toss is probably the most annoying part of the reception for the singles club, you’ll be surprised to learn why the bride and groom used to throw the two at their guests.
In the past, couples didn’t wait until the honeymoon to consummate their marriage. They would often do the deed right after saying “I do,” which came as no surprise to their family members. The bouquet toss was used as a distraction, so she and the groom could…um…handle their business, while all the single ladies fought for the floral bunches. Tossing the garter also symbolized that the groom had made things official, as eager guests waited outside of the bedchamber for proof.
Happy New Year! I love to reflect on my favorite posts from each year and this year was a good one. From the Royal Wedding to new trends and more. So I decided to give my posts an awards show of my favorites in each category. Which one was your fave 2018 awards post?
This wedding was a little bit coastal with a whole lot of pink and modern elements. And I’m alllllll for it. Not only are these two newlyweds ridiculously beautiful but they’re also amazing athletes – the groom plays for the Anaheim Ducks and the bride on the UCLA Volleyball team! From coral hued peonies to the coolest bridal party denim jackets… this wedding just keeps on scorin’. What do you love about this pink coastal wedding?